As If - by Isabel Waidner (Paperback)

Book Synopsis

"A surreal existential caper exploring identity and performance, midlife purpose and regret, and the difficulty of finding--and escaping--yourself. Sly, absurd and poignant, it is a triumph of narrative voice." --The Spectator (UK)

Two men meet in an apartment in London. They are strangers to one another, and yet they look remarkably alike. Lewis is grieving his dead wife; Korine is hiding from his very-much-alive one. Lewis never had children; Korine has just walked out on his. Lewis is a retired actor whose career never amounted to much beyond a bit part on a B-list sitcom; Korine has always dreamed of acting.

Slowly and then all at once, each begins to live on the other's behalf. As Korine answers a casting call under Lewis's name, Lewis finds himself playing father to the other man's son. Each day the strange ruse becomes truer and stranger, more entrenched. Plunged into an existential game of cat-and-mouse, pursuit and retreat, they find that acting might make it possible to, finally, live.

Isabel Waidner's As If is a wily, propulsive, and unusually wise novel about what happens when we fall out of our roles and attempt to make new ones: a tale of thwarted expectation, renewed ambition, and the possibility of escape. It is the story of two men, or maybe one: a love story and a ghost story both.

"This is a stunning book with much to say about how grief can alter our life (or lives). A towering achievement from one of contemporary literature's most original minds." --Kirkus (Starred)

Review Quotes

"Suffused with cosmic bafflement and dark humor. As If plays to these strengths, suggesting how a profusion of selves and their attendant possibilities lie hidden beneath the crust of a chosen identity . . . .Amid the dizzying back-and-forth, Waidner conceals a subtle exploration of midlife crisis. The foreclosed potential of one life clarifies the possibility of another."
--The New York Times

"A spectacular and surreal story of doppelgängers trading places in modern-day London . . . Waidner's delightfully absurd story offers deep insights into the lengths people go to escape their lives. This tale of ambition, loss, and desire for purpose is one of a kind."
--Publishers Weekly (Starred)

"As If holds a multiplying and expanding universe, whose characters are both wonderfully strange and wickedly human. At once twisty and delicious, beautiful and imaginative, this is a book that will surprise you in the best way possible."
--Kristen Arnett, author of Stop Me If You've Heard This One

"An audacious and enchanting novel, As If explores life's alternatives--fantasies and nightmares, encounters dreaded and desired, opportunities lost and gained--in an ingenious setting. We enter its world of doubles and mirror images with a thrill and leave with a deeper understanding of our own naked hearts."
--Yiyun Li, author of Things in Nature Merely Grow

"Every page is exhilarating."
--Deborah Levy, author of August Blue and The Man Who Saw Everything

"As If is an entirely new species of fiction: a spellbindingly clever and profound romp; an urgent exploration of contemporary masculinity in love with, and at war, with itself; a story of desire, art, and redemption. Isabel Waidner is the heir to many legends--Kafka, Bosch, Monty Python, Jonathan Swift--and their new novel summons gorgeous, canny, comedic tulips from the austerity-hammered present. A total stunner."
--Jordy Rosenberg, author of Night Night Fawn

"A brilliant, strange and tender exploration of what it is to fail, keep failing, and fail better."
--Sarah Bernstein, author of Study for Obedience

"As If feels like a great step forward, a maturing of Waidner's talent without losing the quixotic qualities that gave the other books their charm. It cares more about its characters, and less about being unpredictable. It adds depth without sacrificing energy . . . Very funny . . . Impressively dynamic [and] unpredictable."
--John Self, The Telegraph (UK), "Best of"

"Funny and incisive, Waidner's latest piece of genrebusting fiction is a surreal tale of two men with an uncanny resemblance to one another who cross paths and, essentially, swap lives . . . A very clever exploration of alternative lives and paths not taken."
--Marie Claire (UK), "Best of"

"Waidner's writing, always dazzlingly clever and formally inventive, is here also deeply moving. As If is a great success and an intriguing departure: a dourly beguiling dark comedy about fluffing your lines halfway through the performance of a lifetime and being given another chance."
--The Times Literary Supplement (UK)

"A Waiting for Godot transported to the housing estates and grotty sublets of Camberwell, London . . . In Waidner-world the surreal is always lurking, gleefully waiting to trip the reader up . . . Wrenchingly funny and not a little poignant."
--The Guardian (UK)

About the Author