Connectability - by Anna Runkle (Hardcover)

Book Synopsis

Heal trauma-driven disconnection and feel--at last!--like you belong, with guidance from the creator of the Crappy Childhood Fairy healing method and YouTube channel.

Research-backed lessons show anyone suffering from CPTSD and childhood trauma how to form more meaningful, caring relationships.

Does it seem like no matter how hard you try to fit in, you don't feel understood, or like you belong? Like it's so easy for other people to get together and do ordinary things--but for you it feels so awkward and stressful that you avoid social situations. Or you go through the motions of a connected life, but you never really feel close to anyone, even though you don't know why.

You're not alone. An almost universal adult symptom of trauma from childhood is a feeling of disconnection, and it can lead to a lifetime of loneliness, broken relationships, and the feeling that life is passing you by. But Anna Runkle (aka the Crappy Childhood Fairy) is here to help! Step-by-step, she teaches you practical strategies for healing trauma-driven isolation and developing the social skills needed to break the unconscious habits that push others away - what she calls "covert avoidance."

Through stories of her own, prompts for self-reflection, and daily connection plans, Anna guides you to:

• Overcome triggers that make you want to isolate
• Identify the role dysregulation plays in damaging connection
• Learn to trust your instincts, recognize red flags, and set boundaries
• Master the art of small talk, active listening, and "reading the room"
• Gradually build the warm and trusting relationships that everyone needs for a happy life

This book is for anyone who has struggled to form satisfying connections with others, offering a practical, impactful path to the rich life you truly want and deserve.

Review Quotes

"For anyone who's ever felt alone in a crowded room or overwhelmed by connection itself, this book is a lifeline. Drawing from her own lived experience, Anna offers a warm, practical, and deeply relatable guide to healing the wounds of relational trauma. With clarity and compassion, she lays out a daily path to move from isolation to 'connectability' so you can finally feel at ease with others and at home in yourself."
-- Dr. Nicole LePera, author of the #1 New York Times bestsellers How to Do the Work and How to Be the Love You Seek

"If you've ever felt too weird, too broken, too much, or not enough, this book is for you. Connectability isn't self-help fluff. It's a field guide for the misfits, the loners, the ones who've been through a lot, have begun healing, and still want to explore what's left to heal. Anna's been there. She gets it. And her words will help you remember you're not alone and never were."
-- Humble The Poet, international best-selling author of How to Be Love(d)

"For some people, 'connectability' comes naturally. For the rest of us, Anna's book is a game changer. I felt like Anna saw straight through me, to the subconscious things I do that keep me lonely; spoke straight to the core terror that relationships can trigger and to the ways I've blown up relationships in the past; and then took me by the hand and walked me through simple, practical, actionable steps to connect with other humans in a real, deep way. This is exactly what you need when you long for connection but people are also your biggest trigger. Finally, a book from someone who truly understands that paradox."
-- Emma McAdam, licensed marriage and family therapist and founder of Therapy in a Nutshell

"There's a terrible sense of isolation that haunts many of us who grew up with the trauma, even when our lives look successful and connected from the outside. As Anna so powerfully lays out in Connectability, more people than ever before want to have closer, more fulfilling relationships with the people in their lives, but they don't know how. In her inimitable straight-talking and hands-on style, Anna shows you the hidden ways connection wounds manifest and teaches you the precise exercises to break avoidant habits and to feel confident and at ease wherever you go. I wish I'd had Anna's wisdom and guidance during my darkest times, and I'm so glad that you do."
-- Dr. Alex Howard, author of It's Not Your Fault

"Disconnection sits at the heart of the mental health crisis in our society. If you've ever struggled to maintain close relationships--or found yourself keeping others at arm's length--this book is essential reading. The hopeful message Anna offers is that connectability is not fixed; it's a skill you can learn and strengthen, even if you've experienced trauma or attachment wounds early in life. In an era of disconnection, this book is both timely and vital--and may well be a turning point toward a more connected life for those who read it."
-- Niall McKeever, founder, The Weekend University

About the Author

Anna Runkle leads a movement to help men and women worldwide to heal trauma symptoms and change their lives--whether or not they have access to professional help. More than a million men and women worldwide subscribe to her YouTube channel, blog, courses and coaching programs, where she teaches the principles and techniques she has used to recover from her own Childhood PTSD symptoms. Her approach includes simple, self-directed exercises to calm emotional triggers and neurological dysregulation and begin changing the self-defeating behaviors that are common for people who have lived much of their lives dysregulated. She lives with her husband and two sons in the San Francisco Bay Area.

www.crappychildhoodfairy.com