Feeling Lonesome - by Ben Mijuskovic (Hardcover)

About the Book

This book presents an intricate, interdisciplinary evaluation of loneliness that examines the relation of consciousness to loneliness. It views loneliness from the inside as a universal human condition rather than attempting to explain it away as an aberration, a mental disorder, or a temporary state to be addressed by superficial therapy and psychiatric medication.
Loneliness is much more than just feeling sad or isolated. It is the ultimate ground source of unhappiness--the underlying reality of all negative human behavior that manifests as anxiety, depression, envy, guilt, hostility, or shame. It underlies aggression, domestic violence, murder, PTSD, suicide, and other serious issues. This book explains why the drive to avoid loneliness and secure intimacy is the most powerful psychological need in all human beings; documents how human beings gravitate between two motivational poles: loneliness and intimacy; and advocates for an understanding of loneliness through the principles of idealism, rationalism, and insight.

Readers will understand the underlying theory of consciousness that explains why people are lonely, thereby becoming better equipped to recognize sources of loneliness in themselves as well as others. Written by a licensed social worker and former mental health therapist, the book documents why whenever individuals or groups feel lonely, alienated, estranged, disenfranchised, or rejected, they will either withdraw within and shut down, or they will attack others with little thought of consequence to either themselves or others. Perhaps most importantly, the work identifies the antidotes to loneliness as achieving a sense of belonging, togetherness, and intimacy through empathic emotional attachments, which come from a mutual sharing of "lived experiences" such as feelings, meanings, and values; constant positive communication; and equal decision making.

• Provides key insight into the dynamics of loneliness, enabling readers to be able to recognize its sources and counter its insidious and invidious force--not only in one's self, but in others as well
• Presents cross-disciplinary perspectives that addresses and critiques both philosophical and psychological views on loneliness
• Reviews the works and words of philosophers from Descartes to Kant and Wittgenstein, and of psychologists from Freud to Erikson, Fromm, and Mahler
• Authored by a former mental health therapist who has taught philosophy for more than 30 years

Book Synopsis

This book presents an intricate, interdisciplinary evaluation of loneliness that examines the relation of consciousness to loneliness. It views loneliness from the inside as a universal human condition rather than attempting to explain it away as an aberration, a mental disorder, or a temporary state to be addressed by superficial therapy and psychiatric medication.

Loneliness is much more than just feeling sad or isolated. It is the ultimate ground source of unhappiness--the underlying reality of all negative human behavior that manifests as anxiety, depression, envy, guilt, hostility, or shame. It underlies aggression, domestic violence, murder, PTSD, suicide, and other serious issues. This book explains why the drive to avoid loneliness and secure intimacy is the most powerful psychological need in all human beings; documents how human beings gravitate between two motivational poles: loneliness and intimacy; and advocates for an understanding of loneliness through the principles of idealism, rationalism, and insight.

Readers will understand the underlying theory of consciousness that explains why people are lonely, thereby becoming better equipped to recognize sources of loneliness in themselves as well as others. Written by a licensed social worker and former mental health therapist, the book documents why whenever individuals or groups feel lonely, alienated, estranged, disenfranchised, or rejected, they will either withdraw within and shut down, or they will attack others with little thought of consequence to either themselves or others. Perhaps most importantly, the work identifies the antidotes to loneliness as achieving a sense of belonging, togetherness, and intimacy through empathic emotional attachments, which come from a mutual sharing of "lived experiences" such as feelings, meanings, and values; constant positive communication; and equal decision making.

Review Quotes

"Mijuskovic makes a powerful and very persuasive argument for his position, and one learns an enormous amount in following the argument of his superb book." --Philosophy in Review

"Feeling Lonesome is a must read for anyone interested in philosophy of mind, philosophical psychology, or lonelines. . . . Ben Lazare Mijuskovic, PhD., LCSW possesses the rare interdisciplinary pedigree which empowers him to speak to both academic and practical concerns. . . . Feeling Lonesome encapsulates his lifelong study . . . it touches upon our most private selves, our insularity, and our innermost existence in a uniquely interdisciplinary perspective. Mijuskovic encapsulates a life of rich philosophical investigation while tempering his narrative with therapeutic practicality." --Dialogue

"Mijuscovic's Feeling Lonesome: The Philosophy and Psychology of Loneliness is a well researched, highly intricate, and aptly argued contribution to the study of phenomenology. For the theoretical philosopher, the book is a rich source of gripping debates which draws from a variety of great thinkers. For the psychologist, anthropologist, and general social scientist, Mijuscovic has much to offer on the human condition. For those currently struggling to escape the clutches of loneliness, the author offers, at the very least, an insightful and worthwhile approach to understanding how and why we feel lonesome, and what we can do to change that." --Journal of Thought

"The themes of this book are exciting and will be of interest to most psychologists. . . . Clinicians of all persuasions will gain much insight from the therapeutic measures and strategies gathered in the final chapter that can alleviate and console us against the inescapable drag of our existence." --The Psychologist

"Mijuskovic's philosophical exploration of loneliness brings a new perspective to the study of this universal and painful human experience and may of be interest to academics from other disciplines." --Journal of Sociology

"What is striking about Mijuskovic's endeavor is the author's remarkable knowledge and competence across distinct fields, which enables him to integrate a tremendous amount of information from philosophy, psychology, and literature into one complex yet consistent story . . . . [H]is eloquent discussion of the psychological basis of loneliness offers a very persuasive account, rich with valuable insights and instructive considerations. . . . Mijuskovic's book is a proficient application of a true interdisciplinary methodology, providing an intriguing, composite view of loneliness that is both challenging and inspiring for the reader." --Philosophical Practice

About the Author