Held Together - by Rebecca N Thompson (Hardcover)

About the Book

"A primary care physician's moving memoir of navigating a complicated path to motherhood, interwoven with the stories of twenty-one of her patients, friends, and medical colleagues-and sharing the intimate truths of their diverse perspectives on being part of all kinds of families, born and built and chosen"--

Book Synopsis

"Rebecca Thompson's moving book proves that there are as many different ways of becoming a family as there are mothers--a personal, compelling reminder of why women's reproductive health care matters, and why one size does not fit all"--Jodi Picoult, #1 New York Times bestselling author

"Immersive, compassionate, and vulnerable, Held Together invites us to walk with Dr. Thompson as she navigates her own journey to parenthood and the beautiful, messy, uplifting stories of the families she cares for along the way."--Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone

A primary care physician's moving memoir of navigating a complicated path to motherhood, interwoven with the stories of twenty-one of her patients, friends, and medical colleagues--and sharing the intimate truths of their diverse perspectives on being part of all kinds of families, born and built and chosen.

Seventeen years ago, when Rebecca Thompson endured a string of life-threatening pregnancy losses and rare medical conditions, her training as a physician didn't protect her from feeling isolated and overwhelmed. What she longed for was a community of women--or even one encouraging story--to reassure her that she wasn't alone.

Deciding to create the community she couldn't find in her own time of need, Dr. Thompson reached out to friends, patients, and medical colleagues and asked them to share the stories of their personal journeys to parenthood, as well as stories of how their families grew and changed and thrived as they faced challenges beyond those early years. Held Together explores the intersections of these brave, resilient women's lives with Dr. Thompson's own as they encounter a vast range of unexpected turns and obstacles, including fertility issues, adoption, fostering, surrogacy, multiples, abortion, stepparenthood, chronic disease, mental illness, the death of a child, the death of a spouse, and so many moments where grief may threaten to consume us--until joy sometimes surprises us.

The extraordinary stories of ordinary women reveal that, while our individual circumstances may be unique, our experiences are universal in so many ways: we are creating life, raising children, and sustaining families, even as we search for reassurance that we are not alone in our struggles. Held Together offers a place of healing that welcomes every kind of family, a refuge where we make meaning out of our stories and embrace the belief that life can be beautiful in spite of--and often because of--all its complexities and imperfections. Our foundations may not always be strong, but together, we are.

Review Quotes

"This touching, beautifully written work will help many people who have endured loss or complicated paths to parenthood. They are sure to find experiences that resonate with them." -- Library Journal

"In this moving debut, physician Thompson weaves an account of her complicated path to becoming a mother with recollections from colleagues, friends, and patients on their own experiences with parenthood. ... The varied selections prove there's no single, 'normal' route to motherhood. ... This will be a comfort to anyone who's experienced pregnancy complications." -- Publishers Weekly

"Women who are struggling ... may find solace in knowing they're hardly alone. ... Even the stories without fairy-tale endings should make women feel less solitary." -- Booklist

"With wit and bravery, Rebecca Thompson corrals two of life's most terrifying prospects--becoming a parent and becoming a doctor. Her deeply personal narrative is intertwined with the voices of other women who've navigated the complicated shoals of pregnancy, birth, family, and parenthood. Their stories are remarkable for the complexity of human experience and for the commonality of everyday courage. Inspiring!" -- Danielle Ofri, MD, PhD, author of Incidental Findings: Lessons from My Patients in the Art of Medicine

"Rebecca Thompson's moving book proves that there are as many different ways of becoming a family as there are mothers--a personal, compelling reminder of why women's reproductive health care matters, and why one size does not fit all." -- Jodi Picoult, #1 New York Times bestselling author

"Held Together explores the wilderness of motherhood with raw honesty and deep clarity, documenting the stories of a remarkable group of women who have weathered storms and transformed their challenges into new ways of being in the world. Each of the voices in this spectacular and important book touched me, moved me, and made my heart ache in the best possible way. I'm profoundly grateful for this emotional--but never sentimental--reminder that we are not alone on the journey." -- Amber Keyser, PhD, author of The V-Word: True Stories About First-Time Sex and The Way Back from Broken

"Riveting, relatable, and occasionally gutting, the collection of real-life stories in Rebecca Thompson's Held Together is the most perfect book I could possibly recommend to gift to your best friend. Beautifully written and beautifully paced, this compilation of women's voices is an absolute gem." -- Kimmery Martin, MD, author of Doctors and Friends and The Antidote for Everything

"These intricate, interwoven stories speak the truths women too often leave unsaid, the losses we keep to ourselves. They contrast the dichotomies medicine sometimes presents with the uncertain gray areas where so many of us have found ourselves--and even doctors are not immune, as Held Together gently proves. The wide breadth of experiences in these pages can help the rest of us make sense of our own lives. Many books tell us how to care for others, but far fewer show us how we might heal ourselves. Thankfully, there is such a book now." -- Amy Wilson, cohost of What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood and author of Happy to Help

"Held Together is a simply wonderful collection, beautifully written, of deep stories of women who have undergone personal loss and have come out on the other side. It is about pain, suffering, danger, endurance, survival, and transcendence. It is so experientially rich that I couldn't put this book down without wanting to know what would come next. Rebecca Thompson has caught life itself and shared it with us. Mothers, husbands, grandparents, doctors, and nurses should read it and will come away with something so very rare--hard-earned wisdom for the art of living!" -- Arthur Kleinman, MD, Harvard University Professor of Psychiatry, Anthropology, and Global Health and Social Medicine and author of The Soul of Care

"This book does not seem like a book. It seems like a quilt that weaves together stories to create a treasure, and reading it is a healing. The women within these pages share the impact of deep loss, fear, self-doubt, and surprises both agonizing and wondrous. As I read, I was with these women, sitting before them like the receptive and open pages of a journal, absorbing their truths. I hung on every word."
-- Wendy N. Davis, PhD, PMH-C, President and CEO of Postpartum Support International

"This tapestry of intimate stories is a testament to the common humanity found after loss and the beauty found in connection. Thrumming with sorrow and hope, Held Together will comfort those facing challenges on their path to creating families--the families they are born into and the ones they choose." -- Mimi Zieman, MD, author of Tap Dancing on Everest: A Young Doctor's Unlikely Adventure and coauthor of Managing Contraception

"Rebecca Thompson shares stories that exemplify what mental strength looks like during the darkest days, shedding light on topics that are rarely discussed and showing us that we aren't alone in our pain." -- Amy Morin, LCSW, author of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do

"Immersive, compassionate, and vulnerable, Held Together invites us to walk with Dr. Thompson as she navigates her own journey to parenthood and the beautiful, messy, uplifting stories of the families she cares for along the way." -- Lori Gottlieb, MFT, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, Her Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed

"In this timely and touching memoir, Dr. Thompson captures the heartfelt stories of an incredibly diverse group of women. She approaches these women and their families as the thoughtful and experienced physician that she is, recording intimate and sensitive accounts that add critical understanding about complex periods of human development. Held Together is at once powerful and tender--essential reading not only for mothers but for anyone concerned with building a constructive future in a troubled era." -- Robin Karr-Morse, MEd, LPC, Family Therapist, Founding Director of the Children's Trust Fund of Oregon, and coauthor of Ghosts From the Nursery: Tracing the Roots of Violence and Scared Sick: The Role of Childhood Trauma in Adult Disease