Knowing and Being Known - by Erin Faith Moniz & Erin F Moniz (Paperback)

About the Book

Book Synopsis

"I can live without sex, but I can't live without intimacy."

In today's landscape of digital interactions, many people long for deeper connections. We have a desire to move from being lonely and disconnected in our relationships to be seen, known, and wholly loved. From friendships to romantic relationships, meaningful and genuine personal connections remain our heart's desire.

College chaplain Rev. Erin Moniz is deeply attuned to the questions and concerns of today's emerging adults. In Knowing and Being Known, she

• explores the essential elements of healthy relationships,
• addresses the complexities of intimacy,
• and shines a light on the barriers that can impede genuine connection.

With her compelling storytelling and expert insights from her research with emerging adults, she emphasizes the significant role of identity and self-worth in fostering meaningful relationships. This comprehensive resource goes beyond the subject of sex, providing a holistic perspective on intimacy that resonates with single emerging adults and married couples alike.

Begin to experience healthy relationships and transform your relational world as you ask better questions to get better answers. To know that we are loved by God is to know our identity in Christ. And this knowing provides us the tools and the path to a healthy, sustainable intimacy that allows us to be at home in our fullness in the gospel and with each other.

Review Quotes

"At one level, this book may strike you as old hat. Yet another book on relationships and faith by an evangelical Christian author? But look closer. Here is a sensitive study of intimacy written by a seasoned pastor, informed by extensive fieldwork, leavened with wit and humor, and--above all--strikingly in tune with the overarching story as well as the micro details of the Bible's grand story of redemption in Christ. If you or someone you know longs for deeper friendships, and especially if you work with emerging adults, this book will enlighten, instruct, inspire, and equip you for the lifelong work of nurturing mutual love."

Wesley Hill, associate professor of New Testament at Western Theological Seminary

"Every one of us is made for intimacy. Does intimacy mean sex? Is there a way of thinking about intimacy and sex that goes beyond youth group oversimplifications? Yes--and in Knowing and Being Known, Erin F. Moniz shows the way. She guides readers past behavior obsession to the cultivation of virtue. She imparts wisdom, grace, and love in place of shame. She has life-giving medicine and a road map out of the epidemic of loneliness. Every leader in the church should make this book a part of their pastoral practice."

Todd Hunter, author of What Jesus Intended

"In an American Christian context awash in pragmatic--but often reductive--takes on marriage implying that marital intimacy is the best or only way to address loneliness, Moniz points us to a robust, theologically rich, and biblical understanding ofintimacy. Amid our epidemic of loneliness, she expertly offers us humane, approachable, and expansive theological resources to broaden our imagination about friendship, love, and the relationships that shape our lives. This book shows how the gospel is good news for relationships and points the way toward greater relational flourishing for us all."

Tish Harrison Warren, Anglican priest and author of Liturgy of the Ordinary and Prayer in the Night

"In her book Knowing and Being Known, longtime campus pastor Erin Moniz gives us two sacred gifts: a theology of intimacy borne out of a robust examination of the Scriptures and a research-based road map for how to form intimate relationships that are healthy and sustainable. With all of the confusion about what intimacy is and isn't, the church desperately needs a book like Knowing and Being Known. May we use it in both our disciple making and our evangelism!"

Rob Dixon, senior fellow with the InterVarsity Institute and author of Together in Ministry: Women and Men in Flourishing Partnerships

"Rev. Erin F. Moniz is a wise and compassionate guide through the precarious landscape of intimate relationships and Christian faith today. Rooted in the gospel and drawing on psychology, sociology, and theology, Knowing and Being Known offers a much-needed analysis of how we got here and illumines a faithful path forward."

Emily Hunter McGowin, associate professor of theology at Wheaton College and author of Households of Faith

"This wise, timely, and practical book reminds us that real intimacy is far more--and far better--than just sex. Erin's words are a gift to any person, single or married, who longs to cultivate a life of deep relational intimacy. In other words, they are a gift to us all."

Gregory Coles, author of Single, Gay, Christian and No Longer Strangers

"What a breath of fresh air! If you've ever wondered why Christian sexual ethics seem to be limited to 'stay a virgin until you're married and then have lots of sex later, ' get ready for Erin Moniz to replace this anemic way of thinking with a robust theology of intimacy. And that theology challenges so much of what we've been taught: that marriage is the pinnacle; that romance is the point; that sex is the center of everything. What would happen if our churches focused less on stressing marriage and more on creating a culture of wholeness, health, and the vulnerability that is intimacy's currency? Erin's vision of churches transformed by real intimacy is both scary and exciting--and I'm ready for it!"

Sheila Wray Gregoire, founder of BareMarriage.com and coauthor of The Great Sex Rescue

"Young people are longing for connection--in family, in friendship, in romance--but too often, Christian resources on relationships are trite and theologically superficial. Erin Moniz instead offers a rich and robust theological account of intimacy, an account rooted in the triune nature of God, the story of the gospel, and the unshakable reality of our beloved-ness. Knowing and Being Known is an honest, insightful, and essential resource for engaging one of the most urgent pastoral issues of our day."

Zachary Wagner, author of Non-Toxic Masculinity and director of programs at the Center for Pastor Theologians

About the Author

Rev. Erin F. Moniz (DMin, Trinity School for Ministry) is a deacon in the Anglican Church in North America and associate chaplain and director for chapel at Baylor University, where she disciples emerging adults and journeys with them toward healthy, gospel-centered relationships. She is a trained conciliator, mediator, and conflict coach. She enjoys content creation, playing music, being outdoors, and narrating the inner monologue of her two cats. She lives in Waco, Texas, with her husband, Michael.