Proof of Life - by Jennifer Pastiloff (Hardcover)

About the Book

"Having finally achieved professional and financial success, Jen Pastiloff should have been content. She repeatedly told herself that her life was fine and that fine was enough. Mostly though, what she told herself was Who am I to think that I get to leave fine? Until one day, the muted voice saying that something was missing no longer stayed muted, but started screaming. She remembered that we all have an Inner Asshole that whispers in your ear what you SHOULD do and don't do and tells you that you don't deserve more than what you have. She realized she'd been listening too long to the voice of Should. Enough was enough. This book is Pastiloff's account of how she radically changed her own life, leaving her marriage, taking risks professionally, and stepping out of her safe bubble when safety was all she'd ever wanted, after losing her beloved father when she was eight, while imparting her courage and wisdom to inspire readers to do the same. She shows us it is never too late to change the stories we think define us. The ones that deprive us of accepting greater love, fulfillment, and joy. Stories like: I don't deserve this, I'm a bad daughter, No one will ever love me, I'm too old to change, to name a few. Through this book, you learn how to quiet your Inner Asshole, participate in the cathartic process of Shame Loss, recognize your I Got You People, ignore the Imaginary Time Gods, use creativity as a portal into healing, and become your own Permission Slip. As Pastiloff reminds us, it's not about changing who you are but allowing yourself to find your way back to you. Complete with takeaways in Jen's signature writing style, writing prompts, and poetry, Proof of Life is funny, inspiring, and full of love. It's about showing up for yourself and for those around you. In Pastiloff's words, at the end of our lives let's say that we have done love"-- Provided by publisher.

Book Synopsis

An urgent rallying cry to stop holding back and start living life on your terms.

Jen Pastiloff convinced herself My life is fine and fine's enough, until the whisper that something was missing turned full-on scream.

This is Pastiloff's account of how she reclaimed her voice and desire by radically changing her life. She did this despite believing that change equaled death ever since her beloved father died when she was eight. (Much to her shock, change did not equal death.) She shows us it is never too late to begin again, or to let go of stories like: I don't deserve this; I don't get to be happy; no one will love me; I'm too old, to name a few.

Through this book, you'll quiet your Inner Asshole, participate in the cathartic process of Shame Loss, ignore the Imaginary Time Gods, use creativity as a portal into healing and connection, and become your own permission slip. Complete with takeaways in Jen's signature style, creativity prompts, and poetry, Proof of Life is funny, inspiring, and full of love. This book is a reminder that your birthright is not stress or shame and that you don't have to show proof that you are worthy or deserving. You are your own proof of life.

Review Quotes

Praise for Proof of Life

"Jennifer Pastiloff's writing never fails to amaze me, with its depth of honesty and wisdom, and that great sense of humor. I'm a huge fan."
--Anne Lamott

"This book is medicine and magic. I read Proof of Life at a heartbreaking time, and it left me better than it found me. Jennifer Pastiloff has a gift for saying exactly what we need to hear in exactly the way we need to hear it. Proof of Life is compassionate, deeply funny, and full of wisdom."
--Maggie Smith, New York Times bestselling author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful

"Proof of Life is the book I wish I'd had when I was younger. A beautiful reminder that shame isn't our burden to carry, that our story is ours, and that no one ELSE, no matter what, gets to write that story. Through humor and tears, Pastiloff will inspire you to become your own permission slip, as you reclaim any parts of yourself you may have lost along the way."
--Monica Lewinsky

"In Proof of Life, Jennifer Pastiloff dares to teeter while daring us to acknowledge that she sees us teetering. The book is a wonderful example of radical hope in motion."
--Kiese Laymon, New York Times bestselling author of Heavy

"With Proof of Life, Jennifer Pastiloff is using a literary platform to dismantle and reconfigure all that makes life worth its agonies and ecstasies. She does this by endorsing herself as the great experiment that prevails, the raw and beautiful power of example that she has come to be."
--Josh Brolin, author of From Under the Truck and Academy Award nominee

About the Author

Jennifer Pastiloff trots the globe as a public speaker and to host her retreats to Italy, as well as her one-of-a-kind workshops, which she has taught to thousands of people all over the world. The author of the popular Substack, also called Proof of Life, she teaches writing and creativity classes called Allow, and workshops called Shame Loss, when she isn't painting and selling her art. She has been featured on Good Morning America, and Katie Couric, and in New York magazine, People, Shape, Health magazine, and other media outlets for her authenticity and unique voice. She is deaf, reads lips, and mishears almost everything, but what she hears is usually funnier (at least she thinks so). The author of the national bestseller On Being Human, Pastiloff lives in Southern California with her son, Charlie Mel.