Before All Is Said and Done - by Pat Miles & Suzanne Watson (Paperback)

About the Book

Before All Is Said and Done provides insights and advice through the experiences of those that know what it is to navigate the practicalities of losing a loved one while attempting to manage the trauma and grief that accompanies loss.

Book Synopsis

For a culture that finds it difficult to talk about the end of life, Before All Is Said and Done is the roadmap we all need to navigate the practicalities of death while experiencing shock, loss, and grief. - Lee Woodruff, NYT Bestselling Author

The notion of planning for one's death is intrinsically at odds with our human instinct to avoid considering our own mortality. Although we may contemplate the grief that our life's impermanence would cause to our loved ones, we seldom consider the myriad of emotional and legal issues that can arise afterward.

Before All Is Said and Done begins with the experience of author Pat Miles Zimmerman and her husband, Charles Bucky Zimmerman. Pat and Bucky were fully set for life but, regrettably, not set for death. After Bucky's death from an abrupt and short illness, Pat found herself with a plate full of unanticipated emotions, decisions, and legal problems.

But, as she spoke with other widows, she learned she was not alone in finding herself adrift after losing a spouse. The shock and grief that erupt from such a loss do not create a state of mind fit for navigating the numerous challenges that follow an unexpected death.

Pat Miles Zimmerman will prepare us for the oft-ignored problems that run in tandem with somber situations:

• The shock of loss and what to expect
• Facing a potential cognitive decline
• Finding support and healthy grieving
• Family disputes and blended family issues
• Caring for yourself after the loss

Although we may initially shirk away from the notion of our life's transience, it is powerfully beneficial to ready ourselves and our loved ones for every stage of life - and death. Before All Is Said and Done weaves the definitive path on how to be set for both.

Review Quotes

"When you want the best advice, you go to the smartest people you know. Pat Miles is one of those people, and her story puts her in a unique position to offer honest, practical, and compassionate advice. This book is a blessing for survivors navigating the toughest days of their lives."

- Harvey Mackay, NYT #1 Bestselling Author of Swim With the Sharks Without Being Eaten Alive

"For a culture that finds it difficult to talk about the end of life, Before All Is Said and Done is the roadmap we all need to navigate the practicalities of death while experiencing shock, loss, and grief."

- Lee Woodruff, NYT Bestselling Author

"As a former lawyer and judge, I had neither thought about nor been intimidated by end-of-life financial issues. But Before All Is Said and Done paints vividly the difficult realities my wife could encounter should I pass first. The book's read, and the understandably difficult discussions with your spouse and others, are musts for married couples."

- Rick Solum, Hennepin County Judge

"Preparing for and navigating the wealth management challenges of losing a spouse is a critically important topic not adequately addressed by the financial industry. Pat Miles does us all a service in tackling this head-on in her honest, moving, and compelling personal narrative."

- John Taft, Vice Chair of Baird and Author of Stewardship: Lessons Learned from the Lost Culture of Wall Street and A Force for Good: How Enlightened Finance Can Restore Faith in Capitalism

"Through Pat's personal experience with many of these issues, she has compiled an extremely insightful and empathic view of the role of the caregiver. I think this is a must-read for persons and families with loved ones experiencing cognitive challenges."

- Ronald Petersen, PhD, MD, Director, Mayo Clinic Alzheimer's Disease Research Center and the Mayo Clinic Study of Aging

"This a great book that all people in long term relationships must read. A fine reporter applies journalistic fact-finding to alert those of us who miss dotting the i and crossing the t won't have to suffer if we follow the map her own experience has drawn."

- Don Shelby, Former News Anchor, CBS

"The most beautiful, raw, and sacred deaths I've witnessed are those in which the patient's wishes are carried out, it allows them to die with integrity instead of despair. In a culture that tends to avoid the topic of death, this timely book offers invaluable guidance, advice, and gems of wisdom from those who have already 'Walked Each other Home.'"

- Pam Sime, Hospice Nursing Assistant

"This is a riveting read and one that reflects Pat's journalism background and interviewing chops. Pat gives us story after story of real-life experiences of women and men who have had to navigate all the thorny problems one encounters when facing a loved one's death. This is a ground-breaking tutorial for us all-teaching us how to not only avoid the minefields out there but, also, better prepare ourselves financially, legally, emotionally, and even physically before facing the inevitable loss one may someday encounter."

- Nan DeMars, Workplace Ethicist, Trainer, Media Guest, Columnist, and author of You Want Me To Do What? When/Where & How to Draw the Line at Work and You've Got To Be Kidding! How to Keep Your Job Without Losing Your Integrity