Why We Click - by Kate Murphy (Paperback)

Book Synopsis

Why do some people instantly draw you in, while others give you the ick?
In Why We Click, Kate Murphy, author of the international bestseller You're Not Listening, explores the emerging science and powerful impact of interpersonal synchrony, the most consequential social dynamic most people have never heard of.

What is interpersonal synchrony?
The magical yet now scientifically documented tendency of human beings to fall into rhythm and find resonance with one another. Not only do we subconsciously mirror one another's movements and facial expressions, we also sync up our brain activity, heart rates, and hormonal levels. This stunning ability is the basis of human empathy, attachment, and bonding. The more in sync you are with another person, the more connected you tend to feel.

Why We Click will help you:
- Improve and hone your syncing ability for more satisfying (and less draining) social interactions
- Design spaces, plan activities, and develop mindsets conducive to forging and maintaining mutually satisfying relationships
- Get better at reading other people and reading the room
- Resist getting hijacked by other people's negative energy
- Become more in tune with nature and even your pets
- Have more flow experiences, whether they're with other people or within yourself

The bottom line?
From the bedroom to the boardroom, Murphy shows how our instinct to sync drives much of our social behavior. It determines who ends up in our personal and professional networks as well as the depth and duration of our relationships. Interpersonal synchrony is our superpower, but it can also be our kryptonite if we fail to understand its influence on us, both as individuals and as a society.

Review Quotes

"In a world where loneliness is skyrocketing and connection feels harder than ever, Murphy's book is a must-have resource. Why We Click is a fascinating, science-backed reminder that the joy we seek so often begins in rhythm with the people around us."
--Laurie Santos, professor of psychology at Yale University and host of The Happiness Lab podcast

"Why We Click is a searching and fascinating exploration of the up-and-coming science of human connection. Kate Murphy describes, in lucid terms, not only the foundation of the seemingly effortless link between people, but also the devastating consequences of its absence -- all too relevant in a world where digital virtualities are draining real-life interaction from our lives."
--Thomas Lewis, psychiatrist, adjunct professor at UCSF and author of A General Theory of Love

"From start to finish, Why We Click dives deep into how we relate, communicate, and sync our behavior in fascinating and perplexing ways. It's a captivating journey through the science behind the powerful, yet invisible forces that synchronize human behavior."
--Danny Meyer, Shake Shack founder, executive chairman of Union Square Hospitality Group and author of Setting the Table

"As journalist Murphy (You're Not Listening, 2020) explains in this absorbing book, interpersonal synchrony is the tendency people have to fall into rhythm with each other...Murphy proves that, as infectious as a disease, and just as crucial to our health, this human superpower cannot be underestimated."
--Booklist

"Why We Click is popular science at its best. Kate Murphy takes a universal yet mysterious experience--our sense of connection with others--and reveals the surprising science that explains it. Through vivid stories and carefully-conducted research, Murphy transforms an experience that once felt mysterious and magical into something that is perfectly understandable. You'll end this book feeling like you've gotten a new pair of crystal-clear glasses to see your social world through. It's engaging, insightful, and hard to put down!"
--Nicholas Epley, professor of behavioral science at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business and author of Mindwise and A Little More Social

"Grounded in deep research, Why We Click is an accessible, satisfying study that will change the way readers understand themselves and their world."
--Bookpage

About the Author

Journalist Kate Murphy's eclectic essays and articles for The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Economist, Agence France-Presse, and Texas Monthly have been shared and commented on by millions. She is known for her fresh and accessible style and ability to distill complex subjects, particularly the science behind human interactions. Her first book, You're Not Listening: What You're Missing and Why It Matters, was published in thirty-two languages and has become required reading in interpersonal communication courses at high schools, colleges, and universities worldwide. Kate lives in Houston, Texas, and holds a commercial pilot's license.