This Is Body Grief - by Jayne Mattingly (Hardcover)

About the Book

"A path to making peace with your ever-changing body At one time or another, all of us have grieved our bodies as they once were. Getting older means we're no longer as quick or as strong as we used to be. A chronic illness or disability wrecks our plans and sense of self. Maybe no matter what strict diet we follow, we still fall short of society's forever-changing beauty standards. And so we blame our bodies for having betrayed us-when this couldn't be farther from the truth. Yet this is Body Grief: the sense of loss and sorrow of living in a body that changes, often without our say. In This Is Body Grief, Jayne Mattingly offers a healing path through Body Grief so you can feel at home in the skin you're in. Having navigated Body Grief as both an eating disorder recovery coach and as a newly chronically ill and disabled person and advocate, Mattingly walks readers through the range of complex emotions that encompasses this experience with intimate understanding and compassion, starting with dismissal, shock, and anger. Ultimately, she shows your body has never been, is not, and will never be against you. Self-love begins when you learn to trust and work in tandem with your body as it is in this very moment. Although the journey through Body Grief may not be linear, This Is Body Grief shows it's possible to feel at peace with the skin you're in"--

Book Synopsis

"We all need an opportunity to sit gently and thoughtfully with our grief. Consider this book your invitation."--Rachel Cargle, author of A Renaissance of Her Own

A guide to living and making peace with your ever-changing body

Have you ever felt like your body has failed you? Maybe you're not as quick or as strong as you used to be, or an illness has wrecked your sense of self, or no matter what diet you follow, you still feel uncomfortable in your own skin. So you go to war with your body for what it can no longer do--when the truth is, our bodies are always on our side.

In This Is Body Grief, disability advocate and recovery expert Jayne Mattingly lays out a groundbreaking approach to mourning and accepting one's ever-changing body. Like all grief, she says, Body Grief cannot be overcome but felt in all its complexity. Dismantling the narrative that your body is "against you," she presents new ways to cope with your body's fluctuating abilities with self-compassion and grace. Along the way, she walks you through the seven stages of Body Grief--from dismissal, shock, and self-blame to hopelessness and hope, and eventual body trust--offering wisdom for how to make space for each difficult emotion as it arises.

Sharing stories from everyday people in the throes of Body Grief as well as her own journey as a newly-disabled woman--from the first of many harrowing hospital visits that resulted in her own life-altering diagnosis, to having to use a rollator on her wedding day because she could no longer walk safely on her own, to accepting the need for a hysterectomy in her early 30s--Mattingly shows that although healing isn't a linear journey, it begins when we trust and work in tandem with our bodies.

Review Quotes

"We all need an opportunity to sit gently and thoughtfully with our grief. Consider this book your invitation." --Rachel Cargle, author of A Renaissance of Her Own

"In a world that teaches us to ignore, control, or conquer our bodies, Jayne Mattingly intervenes with a much-needed revision to the default framework. Through her own hard-earned wisdom and professional expertise, she offers us language and tools to mend the fractured relationships we've developed with our own bodies. She guides us--gently, powerfully, and tangibly--through the process of building a sturdy home within the only bodies we'll ever have--a desperately needed map for every single one of us." --Rebekah Taussig, PhD, author of Sitting Pretty

"I laughed, I cried, and I related all while reading This Is Body Grief. Jayne beautifully articulates the universal feeling of Body Grief and explores it on both macro and micro levels. It is the perfect blend of informative and vulnerable." --Jacqueline Child, co-founder of Dateability

"As a Black disabled woman, Body Grief is my daily story. Mattingly reminds us that 'without storytelling there is no healing, ' validating why it is important to listen to the stories our bodies tell us. Read this book to heal in your own way. To be angry. To share. To accept. To celebrate and to love your body unconditionally amongst the continuous grief it brings." --Dr. Akilah Cadet, MPH, author of White Supremacy Is All Around

"Beautifully written and unapologetically honest, This Is Body Grief not only dismantles the false narrative that our bodies are against us, but offers a compassionate path through the messy landscape of grief turned inwards. This book is for anyone who's ever felt uncomfortable in their own skin and wants to reclaim their sense of self." --Ciera Rogers, founder of Babes and author of The Outsider Advantage

About the Author

Jayne Mattingly is a disability advocate and eating disorder recovery coach. She is the CEO of Recovery Love and Care, a global virtual eating disorder recovery coaching curriculum and training program. She is also the Founder of the nonprofit The AND Initiative, which aims to provide inspiration, advocacy, resources, support, and the gifting mobility aids to those with chronic illness and physical disabilities. Jayne lives in South Carolina with her husband and pets.